Posts Tagged ‘Chinese Dating Advice’


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Chinese Dating Advice

Chinese Dating advice may be hard to come by for those that want the real deal. Few people understand the Chinese culture and fewer understand the women. I’ve had some experience, though. I’ve been in China for more than 8 years solid and speak the language as well. I’ve lived in Asia for more than 12 years and dated Chinese girls in Thailand, Malaysia, Hong Kong, Vietnam and Singapore.

When I lived in China, I stayed in Beijing, Henan, Inner Mongolia, GuangDong, Liaoning and Heilongjiang provinces. Those are just the main provinces in which I lived and hung out and I dated Chinese girls in each place I lived. The cities are too many to mention and most people have never heard of most of them. And I wasn’t a teacher. Sure, I spent some time helping the Chinese learn English, but I was also an actor in movies did hi-tech projects and worked as a tour guide for Chinese traveling abroad. In short, I know the Chinese and I know Chinese girls. So, this is one man’s informed opinion because I understand Chinese dating worldwide.

It used to be hard to meet Chinese and dating Chinese women was even harder. We didn’t know their language and they didn’t know ours – even those that were born and raised in the USA or another western country. They kept to China town. Now, you can visit a Chinese dating site and – voila – meet a Chinese girl and get a Chinese date in no time. Chinese dating sites make it much easier to meet that girl you’re dying to meet. If you’re really into Chinese girls dating, you can meet one nearby. Just go to some local chat sites or a Chinese dating service and you can probably find a Chinese lady in your area if you are in or near a big city. The barriers are much lower than before. But just getting a date and meeting the girl is only the beginning. There’s a lot more to it than that.

You should understand some key things about her culture. Regardless of how ‘western’ the girl may behave, she probably listens to her parents when it comes to any major decision in life. This involves schooling, career, where she lives, how she dresses and especially who she marries. We don’t even want to mention dating because with most Chinese, it is just a formality that leads to marriage. This is actually a double whammy as well. Not only are her parents the most important people in her life forever, she was raised to believe her culture is far superior to anything in the West.

So, your ideas and preferences will only be valid if they agree with her culture and her family- unless she has become what they call a banana. Yellow on the outside and white on the inside; she looks Chinese but thinks like a Westerner. Unless you want to be assimilated by the Chinese culture borg, bananas are great – the best of both worlds. If you like the cultural differences, the Chinese have a lot of offer and maybe you prefer that. It is all a matter of personal choice. If that is your choice, there’s more to know – much more.

You should know about both money and religion when it comes to dating a Chinese girls. Although many claim Buddhism, with all my years in China, I never witnessed Chinese that were religious in the sense that Christians or Muslims are. They have ceremonies in China and traditions they follow. They burn paper money thinking the ashes will somehow reach their relative – but know it won’t and the money is fake. In fact, they build entire miniature homes and cars out of paper to burn for their dead relatives. They don’t quite believe it, but they do it anyway. When it comes to how to fill a drink, when to eat and how to eat, there are traditions and rules uncountable.

You should know the host always pays and the bill is never split. This is something the ‘crude westerners’ do. Everything about the culture is considered empirically correct to a degree you won’t find in many cultures in the world. Money is a symbol of power and since it is the substance of prosperity, it holds a very special place with Chinese girls.

Most women around the world feel a rich man is good because he can provide. With the Chinese it is much more. It means he is clever, powerful and attractive. If you are bit overweight, you will be told a million times by the Chinese that this is a symbol of power, too. This is in contrast to an emaciated person. But, you’d better throw lots of money around, or those extra pounds are just fat. Since money is king, getting money, keeping money, cheating for money and swindling others is accepted. There is no God in China that will punish you for cheating in business, only gods that have blessed you by rewarding your dishonesty. This is rephrased as being ‘clever’. The Chinese girl you meet will have been raised with these basic beliefs.

This may sound a bit negative or turn you off a bit about Chinese women. Don’t let it get you down. There are plenty of wonderful qualities you’ll find in your Chinese date. Luckily for you, if she considers dating you, she probably is fed up with Chinese men. As can happen in Chinese culture, the men do what they want and are pretty impervious to complaining from women in general. This may be why you see precious few western women with Chinese men, but many western men dating Chinese women. Western men treat a lady better and know about chivalry and women’s rights. Western men are also much more honest and true to their women in general and the Chinese ladies know that.

So, if you’re looking to do some Chinese dating and you have the dream of Chinese girls in your mind, you’re in the right place at the right time. The odds are on your side form the Chinese dating sites to the cheap air fares to the ease of which you can communicate on line. Just be sure you understand the culture and don’t make too many mistakes with that girl you really care about. Being under-informed may make you a lonely guy.

Chinese Dating Advice for Everyone

Those looking for Chinese Dating Advice will be happy to learn what we have to say here. Not only do we deal with Chinese dating worldwide, but we mention a few things about going out on a Chinese date and dating Chinese women in general. One thing worth focusing on when considering Chinese dating, is the differences and similarities between western and eastern cultures. If your potential partner has grown up in China, there will definitely be some differences in habits and behavior. If she grew up in the West, there may still be some real differences.

One key difference that may impact your approach to dating a Chinese girl is your intentions. Maybe you feel your intention is very simple – you intend to date. With someone from the Chinese culture, this is probably nowhere near specific enough. With a Western girl, you can probably do what you like and make decisions as the relationship progresses. She will do the same. The man is not the decider and the woman takes upon herself more responsibility about how the relationship will progress.

A Chinese girl that lives deeply within her culture may expect marriage within a year or less unless you make your intentions known. If you do say that marriage may not be an option or that you haven’t considered it and may not even consider it anytime soon, you may lose her. Even worse – if you don’t mention it – she may think that the more time you are together means for sure you will stay together. As in marriage.

Another thing you want to consider when dating a Chinese girl is public displays of affection and the concept of ‘face’. Normally, you shouldn’t hug, kiss or even hold hands in public. Your girl may be a tiger in the bedroom or behind closed doors, but she will fight you off in public and she will mean it. The Chinese have a very strong concept of appearance. Regardless of the truth behind things, what others really know, and the obvious reality of things, they want to appear a certain way to the rest of the world. Even close friends and family are part of this deception. If you play along, it might just save the relationship.

Whether you found your Chinese girl from Chinese dating sites or a Chinese dating service, she still may be very conservative or liberal. She’ll also think some things about you that may not be true at all. The Chinese in China are taught from a young age that promiscuity is rampant in the West and most of what they see in the movies is true. It won’t take her long to see that most Western people are much more conservative than the Chinese in general.

This is mostly because there are very few religious people in China. Their greatest focus is on prosperity. So, if you are prosperous, this is a major attraction for countless Chinese women.
So, remember, these words of Chinese Dating advice. Think about your intentions in advance. Be sensitive to how strong the Chinese culture resides in her heart and try to be open to whatever surprises that might come along. True love and patience can get you through many challenges.


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